I’m going to put it out there right at the start of this post… I am happy! The past week has been a good one for me; I’ve had two pieces of very good news and I’ve made two important decisions.
As a rule I am hopeless at decisions, but I’ve made two big ones this week, and what’s more I feel happier for having made them. And not just happier but relaxed. Proud of myself even.
The first piece of good news and the first big decision are both related to my divorce. I had a letter from my solicitor informing me that the judge had accepted my application for a divorce and that the Decree Nisi would be read out in open court on May 28th. Six weeks after that date I can apply for the Decree Absolute and that chapter of my life will officially/legally be over.
I’m sure some will find it distasteful that I view this as good news; that it makes me happy. For some divorce is not something to celebrate, but something to weep over. I have heard it said that divorce represents failure… and it does. But not my failure, not even his failure, but the failure of our marriage. No one marries expecting it to end. I had my dream wedding, I wanted a dream marriage. But it wasn’t to be. I have wept for my marriage, I have quite literally cried a river. I have blamed myself, I have blamed him, I have examined and reexamined 15 years of my life… And now it is time to face the future, not looking over my shoulder with regret and sadness, but looking forward with a big smile on my face and a spring in my step.
The end of yesterday is a good thing, because it officially marks the beginning of tomorrow.
The second piece of good news and the big decision that accompanies it must remain under wraps for the time being. But all will become clear very soon.
So that’s the big news… what other happy news?
Last weekend, Darren and I walked 23 miles and my feet held together! 🙂 Oh yes… all the way from Reading to Marlow with just two small blisters. I have to admit I was rather nervous about embarking on the walk after the way my feet fell apart during our last long walk from Oxford to Reading (over two days) but my fears were unfounded.
It was a great weekend all round, not just on the feet front. A rare break in the recent wet weather meant our good fortune with walking weather continued. The sun shone on us as we made our way from Reading bridge along the Thames Path, through Sonning, to Henley – where we stopped for lunch – and then on to Marlow. All the rain of late had left the Thames somewhat swollen and it was actually quite astonishing to see the speed with which it was travelling along, gushing through the weir gates and swirling around the bridge piers. As ever we spent our day snapping away (photos to be found in the 2012 gallery) and chatting about anything and everything. Eight hours of walking slipped quickly by and we were both astonished to find ourselves enjoying an end of walk pint in Marlow at 6pm, feeling like it should only be mid afternoon. A fabulous day! (The only minor niggle being Darren forgetting to put his knee supports on and ending the day in a bit of pain; poor fella.)
The next day we enjoyed a rare lie in, followed by probably the laziest day we’ve had for quite some time. We barely left the sofa until 4pm when we made our way to the station for a trip into London to see Prong. Who? Prong! No?…
…I’d never heard of them either but having learnt that Darren was planning on going alone as his usual gang of gig buddies didn’t like them, I offered to keep him company. I’m not generally one for “shouty” music but I have to say I really enjoyed myself. I even tapped my foot a few times! And it was a real laugh watching some of the smaller guys getting thrown around the, erm, dance floor/mosh pit. Still nursing a sore knee, and with the floor covered in beer, Darren opted for watching and enjoying from a distance. But it did make me smile seeing him really enjoying it.
Well, I guess I should take my happy self up the wooden stairs to bedfordshire… It’s going to be a busy weekend spent in the best of company with my beautiful girls, my gorgeous man and his beautiful girls. I’ll probably be glad to get to work on Monday for a rest!